If you don’t want to be like them, their insults are compliments in disguise

I don’t want to end up like a workaholic, suit-and-tie, pear-shaped businessperson. If they call me lazy or unambitious, that’s a compliment.

I don’t want to end up like a shallow, appearance-focused trend-follower. If they insult my sense of fashion or worn-out shirt, that’s a compliment.

I don’t want to end up like a pessimistic, doomscrolling news consumer. If they call me uncivilized for not staying in the loop, that’s a compliment.

I don’t want to end up like an obnoxious-if-not-narcissistic Instagram gym rat. If they call me small or hit me with the “do you even lift bro?”, that’s a compliment.